Goodbye Mr Clean
Spot for March 10, 2026
I heard that “they” are retiring Mr Clean as a brand icon. Is nothing sacred?
My thanks to Peter Berryman who basically saved this song from oblivion.
Goodbye MR Clean
He’s bald. Got an earring
Muscles bulging from his tight t shirt.
He’d make your household spotless.
He’s the enemy of all that’s dirt.
But after 68 years of scrubbing,
But now he’s done with the scene.
Goodbye Mr Clean
no more wiping the handprints
From your bathroom door.
No more mopping magic
on the mud on your linoleum floor.
No more riding in like a white knight
To rescue a homemaking queen
Good bye Mr Clean
He’ll play poker and euchre
With other discarded brands.
Like the California Raisins. Mr Peanut
And the lonely Maytag man.
Youtube clips of their greatest hits
Scroll on a tv screen.
Goodbye Mr Clean
He always had a special spot under the kitchen sink
But he made me a little nervous when he’d cross his arms and wink.
He can come to my house some weekend
And tackle the clutter and grime
If he ever gets nostalgic
For a simpler time
We used to think it was in reach
To make the world pristine
Good bye Mr Clean
Like a genie in a bottle
finally released
He can let himself dive into
mud and crud and grease.
He’s got himself a brand new name,
Stenciled on a ragged shirt
Goodbye Mr Clean. Hello Mr Dirt
© Stuart Stotts 2026
Hey Stuart, maybe you could do more collaborations with Peter. Seems like you’re a good team.
Loved that guitar work.